A good friend of mine from the "male" species is looking out to get settled in life and is on a dating spree, most of who he met online. So happens that every Friday evening, he tells us with a positive spirit " This would be it! I have a Saturday déjeuner with a wonderful woman!" or " Tomorrow's the day! I am so getting hooked for life !" or "Give it 6 weeks! This dining table will have another awesome member-my wife!" , its been almost 2 years, my good friend is still in high spirits and positive that she is around somewhere! He just needs to improve his detective skills to trace her :D
I couldn't help but notice that there were some really nice girls who we all thought would be ' the one ' but he didn't think so. Apparently, most.. okay all Indian women fall in one of the three categories -
Sativikam - Or the typical behanjee types. They can be spotted in by the typical neatly oiled hair with flowers or the unbelievable bright colored dresses that goes with a matching scrunchy or hair clips, matching handbags, matching ornaments and lipsticks and even the nail enamels and the only cosmetic they have ever known is " Fair and lovely fairness cream" If such a person decides on pink - chances are that it would look like giant cotton candy walking on the road.
They all have a common motto " virtuous, chaste and pure" A major chunk belongs to this group and most guys would either take a pass or be extremely impressed with this seemingly innocent coy untainted darling.
Prachodakam - The behenjees turned modern! Jeans and Kurta ,a modest blouse and capris are the style statement. They love window shopping and eating at fancy restaurants. Most definitely wear an eyeliner or mascara and a lipstick. Whatever they wear usually is neutral shade summed up with black,brown or beige bags and sandals. Self sufficient job and a lot of friends.
If you say Code - they can relate it to a. DaVinci Code b. Armani Code
This group is most sought after, most difficult to please and also the group that leaves the most number of heart breaks. Sadly, they are stuck in between wanting to be like the mods but have the hearts of behenjees :D
Bayanakam - The mods of yesterday, today and tomorrow. They are probably wearing a Jimmy Choo shoe teamed with a stylish Chanel bag. They can carry off a red or a fluorescent green in the most sexy way. They can seem to be extremely intimidating to some and intriguing to some others . Usually seen hanging out with this guy who is most definitely classified as loser by all the other guys.
My good friend says, he would like to go out with someone from this potpourri but pretty sure he wouldn't want to wake up next to her whispering sweet nothings till death does them apart!
And so I took courage to ask what exactly he had in his mind, and this is what he said - she has to wake up as a Sativikam , goes on to become a Prachodakam at noon and finally turns into Bayanakam at night!
.... and I am speechless.. so am typing
Sunday, September 20, 2009
Wednesday, August 5, 2009
Tring Tring Tring!
It takes me almost an hour to reach my office everyday and I take a ride in the company bus everyday to work.
Well, its the electronic era and you cannot help the plethoric usage of mobile phones however annoying it could be to the person sitting next to you.. some people don't even spare bathrooms.So, you end up listening to someone's life history whether or not you like it. One of the kinds where you can proudly proclaim " you don't really have a choice"
There have been many such phone talkers who sit next to me in my hour's bus ride everyday and here are the kind I have met so far -
"Duh" talkers - These talkers are on a work call and have just been asked a question for which they have no clue about the answer, they hope to buy an extra 30 seconds time by asking the person on the other side to repeat the question with the refined " I beg your pardon" or " what was it again please " or " please could you repeat that one more time" or my personal favorite " your voice got cut off " although both parties know communication system has developed far beyond that. You can identify them with the constant frown and the hopeful look that they have an answer atleast to the next question and try not say "Duh"
"Butterfly" talkers - These talkers have just started to date someone new or fresh in a relationship. These callers usually have a big smile on their faces that have a " you are the light of my life" or something lamer than that stuck on their foreheads. If its a woman she is probably playing with her hair while on the phone and if its a guy don't miss the " she's the one" deep look on the phone and then a nod to left and then to the right just after he hung up.. I call them butterfly talkers because they are buttering up each other and flying in the clouds.. may be singing a song..
"Kin" talkers - These talkers make it a point to use the bus journey to talk to their family.Guys who have a girl sitting next to them make it a point to be really sweet on the mom calls just so they can say " you know moms" before they hang up and there.. they have a perfect family person image.. If its women, they would make sure that they pour out all their problems to this poor unknown person who has no interest in their personal life.
Well, its the electronic era and you cannot help the plethoric usage of mobile phones however annoying it could be to the person sitting next to you.. some people don't even spare bathrooms.So, you end up listening to someone's life history whether or not you like it. One of the kinds where you can proudly proclaim " you don't really have a choice"
There have been many such phone talkers who sit next to me in my hour's bus ride everyday and here are the kind I have met so far -
"Duh" talkers - These talkers are on a work call and have just been asked a question for which they have no clue about the answer, they hope to buy an extra 30 seconds time by asking the person on the other side to repeat the question with the refined " I beg your pardon" or " what was it again please " or " please could you repeat that one more time" or my personal favorite " your voice got cut off " although both parties know communication system has developed far beyond that. You can identify them with the constant frown and the hopeful look that they have an answer atleast to the next question and try not say "Duh"
"Butterfly" talkers - These talkers have just started to date someone new or fresh in a relationship. These callers usually have a big smile on their faces that have a " you are the light of my life" or something lamer than that stuck on their foreheads. If its a woman she is probably playing with her hair while on the phone and if its a guy don't miss the " she's the one" deep look on the phone and then a nod to left and then to the right just after he hung up.. I call them butterfly talkers because they are buttering up each other and flying in the clouds.. may be singing a song..
"Kin" talkers - These talkers make it a point to use the bus journey to talk to their family.Guys who have a girl sitting next to them make it a point to be really sweet on the mom calls just so they can say " you know moms" before they hang up and there.. they have a perfect family person image.. If its women, they would make sure that they pour out all their problems to this poor unknown person who has no interest in their personal life.
Monday, June 29, 2009
Bond!
I am not talking James Bond - Bond also means attachment! Where there is a bond.. there is nostalgia.
"Moving on" of any degree is hard and definitely something every single person has gone through atleast once in their lives.
It could be something as painful as death of a loved one/family or a heartbreak or something as easy as moving from one rented apartment to another.
Some of it leaves a singe, some make us stronger while some others just leave us with this unforgettable nostalgia.
"Moving on" of any degree is hard and definitely something every single person has gone through atleast once in their lives.
It could be something as painful as death of a loved one/family or a heartbreak or something as easy as moving from one rented apartment to another.
Some of it leaves a singe, some make us stronger while some others just leave us with this unforgettable nostalgia.
Ammi or grinding stone
This week was hard on my father as we were asking him to get rid of things that seemed to be of no use for any of us.. like an 80's radio which makes a whirring noise instead of catching signals ,his 100 odd complimentary diaries given by various people or his 1960 ammi and aatu kall ( granite grinding stones used in olden days to make powder and paste of spices manually) , or his big box which had all outdated reference manuals and so many more.
But well, he was attached to them and didn't want to part with them but eventually had to give in. But just before he agreed to get rid of the stuff, he showed a couple of thing. Tears welled up my eyes when I saw his collection - my favorite blue frock which apparently I wore almost everyday when I was 4 years old, a telegram which said " God blessed us with baby girl. Mother and child healthy" , my first school uniform which has " Mini LKG C" tag on it, the hand made drawing I had made for his birthday with 'hapy burth bay dady' written on it. And then he asked ' how could I ever part with these ?"
I thought it over, I had over 300 greeting cards, restaurant bills, photographs, my barbie and teddy bear collection, copies of my pay checks and so many more that I had collected over a period of years and I don't use any of them nor are they of any use to others.. but would I want to part with them ? Nah ha! I don't think so.. but how come its fair to ask others to get rid of their stuff ?
I then decided everyone has right to keep things that make them happy however insignificant it may be to others. Yeah! Its true that it adds to the pile of junk at the garage but it looking at it.. possibly just once every ten years.. whenever.. if it can bring a smile to someone.. it better be there..
Its sad I had to learn it this way the importance of things that are trivial to others but probably the most satisfying thing in the world. Ah!Well, another lesson learnt.
Thursday, June 11, 2009
A day at work
Last Friday turned to be more hectic than other days. Turned out a member in my team accidentally overwrote a critical file causing a major production down scenario and rebuild activity would take over 3 days.
Sheila has never made such a mistake in the past and simply couldn't forgive herself for the blunder she did. Like all women, she used the tears to vent her frustration out. The whole team did not give up on her and tried to get her out of it. Five days later she is still at the same state - upset and still not forgiven herself.
So, today I decided to get all the freshers in a room and give them a parental-work advice. This is what I said -
" If you ever get a chance watch a cocoon turn into a butterfly, it seems like its in so much pain and misery that you would just want to break the shell and get the butterfly out. But never ever do it because its the struggle that makes its wings stronger.
So, if you face a lot of difficulties and challenges in your initial learning face,remember it only makes you bolder and stronger and helps you progress. Don't get discouraged by the mistakes you make or think of yourselves any less. Although you may need to slow down a bit to see where you stand.
Making mistakes is okay.. but learn from it and make sure that you know what you did wrong and propagate so others avoid making the same mistakes.
Learning from your own mistakes is something but learning from others mistakes - Awesome! But make sure that when someone in the team or outside makes a mistake, you are not just the audience enjoying someone getting all the bashing - it could be you tomorrow..
When I first started to work with a bunch of 25+ years experienced people, while I hardly had 2 years of total work experience, I was asked to give a presentation to some well experienced people in the market. As it was my first time, I had a rehearsal before the actual meeting. We went to a conf room which had a keyboard in UK layout. I couldn't figure it out and couldn't even login as the @ was not shift+2 or # was no longer shift+3.. and with all the nervousness I was fumbling away to glory.. and then suddenly one the senior members asked me to leave the room, and suggested I learn using the key board first and then call them for a meeting or atleast when I am sure I was prepared to give the presentation. All others- Loud Laugh!
I was devastated. But I didn't give up, I made sure I knew not just the UK keyboard but French or even Arabic or be it any language key board and next day I gave my presentation and got pretty good response.
So, its a true story from myself , muster up and smile ! Take life easy.. work is something.. not everything!
Good Luck!
And then I caught a couple of guys yawning but I came out happy because I made Sheila smile after 5 days :D
Sheila has never made such a mistake in the past and simply couldn't forgive herself for the blunder she did. Like all women, she used the tears to vent her frustration out. The whole team did not give up on her and tried to get her out of it. Five days later she is still at the same state - upset and still not forgiven herself.
So, today I decided to get all the freshers in a room and give them a parental-work advice. This is what I said -
" If you ever get a chance watch a cocoon turn into a butterfly, it seems like its in so much pain and misery that you would just want to break the shell and get the butterfly out. But never ever do it because its the struggle that makes its wings stronger.
So, if you face a lot of difficulties and challenges in your initial learning face,remember it only makes you bolder and stronger and helps you progress. Don't get discouraged by the mistakes you make or think of yourselves any less. Although you may need to slow down a bit to see where you stand.
Making mistakes is okay.. but learn from it and make sure that you know what you did wrong and propagate so others avoid making the same mistakes.
Learning from your own mistakes is something but learning from others mistakes - Awesome! But make sure that when someone in the team or outside makes a mistake, you are not just the audience enjoying someone getting all the bashing - it could be you tomorrow..
When I first started to work with a bunch of 25+ years experienced people, while I hardly had 2 years of total work experience, I was asked to give a presentation to some well experienced people in the market. As it was my first time, I had a rehearsal before the actual meeting. We went to a conf room which had a keyboard in UK layout. I couldn't figure it out and couldn't even login as the @ was not shift+2 or # was no longer shift+3.. and with all the nervousness I was fumbling away to glory.. and then suddenly one the senior members asked me to leave the room, and suggested I learn using the key board first and then call them for a meeting or atleast when I am sure I was prepared to give the presentation. All others- Loud Laugh!
I was devastated. But I didn't give up, I made sure I knew not just the UK keyboard but French or even Arabic or be it any language key board and next day I gave my presentation and got pretty good response.
So, its a true story from myself , muster up and smile ! Take life easy.. work is something.. not everything!
Good Luck!
And then I caught a couple of guys yawning but I came out happy because I made Sheila smile after 5 days :D
Sunday, May 10, 2009
I love you Mom !
A few years ago, a close friend of mine invited me over to his place for lunch stating his mother was the world's best cook. I did go with high hopes and found the menu wasn't extra-ordinary nor was the taste. In fact it seemed very ordinary - no where close to how he had described.
While we dined, I couldn't help wondering what was really so great about it that he relished so much and certified that his mother was indeed the world's greatest chef.
Several days later, as always my mother was waiting for me to join for dinner.It was the usual rice and curry followed by the routine curd rice. But it was awesome. I realized why I find the daily routine food to taste like divine nectar.
I now understood what my friend meant - the distinct difference between a food from a restaurant and when a mother serves food. A mother never simply serves food - she puts all her love , care , affection and every thing synonymous to good into food while serving. As she serves, she prays that every meal and every morsel her child eats may bring the best of health and happiness. Thats what makes the food extra special and that can only be felt by the person whose mother is serving food.
That is the power of a mother.
In malayalam, there is a saying " Kaaka kunju pon kunju " ( literal translation - crow's baby is golden baby ) - meaning however ugly be the nestling to others, the mother raven always considers its child to be the most beautiful and most precious.
But there is no saying with the reverse in any language - i.e a person thinking the mother is most precious however she be .. why ? - Because a mother never expects but simply gives .. first her blood and bones when the baby is in the womb, then her youth answering the one million questions a day the child asks, then her life savings so her child can stand on its own legs and finally her whole life..
There are many who believe in rebirth. The belief is that the good deeds and sins committed in the present birth determines how your life would be in the next one. If such a thing exists, then I believe that every woman who has become a mother must have done definitely done all the good deeds !
Like a full python, I sit all day on the sofa and ordering my mother around and she has decided that if ever there be a evil mother in law day, she would be getting me a cake to celebrate the day. :D Apparently, I fit the bookish evil mother-in-law character very well :D
Well, I hope she gets me a pineapple cake.. :D :D
To all the awesome mothers and the lucky `to be' mothers.
Happy Mother's day !!!!
While we dined, I couldn't help wondering what was really so great about it that he relished so much and certified that his mother was indeed the world's greatest chef.
Several days later, as always my mother was waiting for me to join for dinner.It was the usual rice and curry followed by the routine curd rice. But it was awesome. I realized why I find the daily routine food to taste like divine nectar.
I now understood what my friend meant - the distinct difference between a food from a restaurant and when a mother serves food. A mother never simply serves food - she puts all her love , care , affection and every thing synonymous to good into food while serving. As she serves, she prays that every meal and every morsel her child eats may bring the best of health and happiness. Thats what makes the food extra special and that can only be felt by the person whose mother is serving food.
That is the power of a mother.
In malayalam, there is a saying " Kaaka kunju pon kunju " ( literal translation - crow's baby is golden baby ) - meaning however ugly be the nestling to others, the mother raven always considers its child to be the most beautiful and most precious.
But there is no saying with the reverse in any language - i.e a person thinking the mother is most precious however she be .. why ? - Because a mother never expects but simply gives .. first her blood and bones when the baby is in the womb, then her youth answering the one million questions a day the child asks, then her life savings so her child can stand on its own legs and finally her whole life..
There are many who believe in rebirth. The belief is that the good deeds and sins committed in the present birth determines how your life would be in the next one. If such a thing exists, then I believe that every woman who has become a mother must have done definitely done all the good deeds !
Like a full python, I sit all day on the sofa and ordering my mother around and she has decided that if ever there be a evil mother in law day, she would be getting me a cake to celebrate the day. :D Apparently, I fit the bookish evil mother-in-law character very well :D
Well, I hope she gets me a pineapple cake.. :D :D
To all the awesome mothers and the lucky `to be' mothers.
Happy Mother's day !!!!
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
Everyone's happy at weddings
I attended the wedding reception of a colleague today. While at the reception , I looked at the men and women around and wondered what they must be thinking and below is my biggest bet -
Age Group : under 18
No School. New Clothes. New Friends. Lots of people to bug. Lots of time to play. No work - No tension
Age Group - 19-25
Girls - I hope I meet someone ...... umm.. my special someone ( giggles giggles )
Boys - I hope to mate someone ....... someone , anyone ..
Age Group : 28-32
Single Women - I am getting old. Oh God ! Mera number kab aayegaa ?
Single Men - Where did all the beauties go away ? Happens to me in every wedding I go.
Married Men and Women - "I love being Married - I want be single again" / "I love being Married - I want be single again" / "I love being Married - I want be single again" ....................
Age Group : 35 - 55
Married Women - Thank God for these weddings. I don't have to cook today.
Married Men - Thank God for these weddings. I don't have to eat what my wife's cooks today. :D
Age group : 55-65
Women with daughters - I hope this girl behaves well with everyone, especially in front of those aunties who will tear me apart if they find out she isn't trained in domestic skills. Girls are such big responsibility for parents.How I wish I had a son instead.
Women with sons - I hope everyone is noticing the sparkling new diamond necklace my US return son got me just for this wedding. Thank god for giving me a son.
Women with daughters in law - There should be a daughter in everyone's house. Once a new wife comes, the mother is fully forgotten. But look at girls they are still as attached to their mothers as they were before and enjoy their husband's generosity as well. How I wish I had a daughter.
Women with sons in law - So what if my daughter was not trained in domestic skills, with her smartness she now has her husband tied to her little finger. Thank God for giving me a daughter.
Age Group : 65 -80
Women - Ok. There's a girl. Medium build - not OK ,Mid-twenties - well OK, wearing some jewelery- OK , seems well mannered - Hmmm good. Complexion - Very fair - TEST PASSED. She might be a good match for Alamelu''s son Santhana Krishnan. Let me go bug her with ' you are next'. ( Evil laugh )
Men - Ok. There's a guy. He is single. He has a job - TEST PASSED. I must warn him the consequences of marriages. At least let him enjoy bachelor life as long as it lasts.
And so on... :D
Age Group : under 18
No School. New Clothes. New Friends. Lots of people to bug. Lots of time to play. No work - No tension
Age Group - 19-25
Girls - I hope I meet someone ...... umm.. my special someone ( giggles giggles )
Boys - I hope to mate someone ....... someone , anyone ..
Age Group : 28-32
Single Women - I am getting old. Oh God ! Mera number kab aayegaa ?
Single Men - Where did all the beauties go away ? Happens to me in every wedding I go.
Married Men and Women - "I love being Married - I want be single again" / "I love being Married - I want be single again" / "I love being Married - I want be single again" ....................
Age Group : 35 - 55
Married Women - Thank God for these weddings. I don't have to cook today.
Married Men - Thank God for these weddings. I don't have to eat what my wife's cooks today. :D
Age group : 55-65
Women with daughters - I hope this girl behaves well with everyone, especially in front of those aunties who will tear me apart if they find out she isn't trained in domestic skills. Girls are such big responsibility for parents.How I wish I had a son instead.
Women with sons - I hope everyone is noticing the sparkling new diamond necklace my US return son got me just for this wedding. Thank god for giving me a son.
Women with daughters in law - There should be a daughter in everyone's house. Once a new wife comes, the mother is fully forgotten. But look at girls they are still as attached to their mothers as they were before and enjoy their husband's generosity as well. How I wish I had a daughter.
Women with sons in law - So what if my daughter was not trained in domestic skills, with her smartness she now has her husband tied to her little finger. Thank God for giving me a daughter.
Age Group : 65 -80
Women - Ok. There's a girl. Medium build - not OK ,Mid-twenties - well OK, wearing some jewelery- OK , seems well mannered - Hmmm good. Complexion - Very fair - TEST PASSED. She might be a good match for Alamelu''s son Santhana Krishnan. Let me go bug her with ' you are next'. ( Evil laugh )
Men - Ok. There's a guy. He is single. He has a job - TEST PASSED. I must warn him the consequences of marriages. At least let him enjoy bachelor life as long as it lasts.
And so on... :D
Sunday, April 19, 2009
Stories
Every individual has a distinct personality, some positive , some negative , some pleasing , some annoying while some others make absolutely no difference to hoi polloi. One such distinct trait in me is my absentmindedness.
With due respect to my absentmindedness, I have decided to make a collection of moral stories that I have heard or read someplace that made a difference in my life. These stories retold is what I will be telling my grand and great children.
The Happy Puppy Story -
Once upon a time in a distant land , far far away there was a large colosseum like structure. In it was mirrors, thousands and thousands of mirrors. One such day, a puppy that got lost enters this house of mirrors. It looks , and sees a thousand puppies looking at it anxiously. It gives out an angry ruff and it sees a thousand angry looking puppies. It thinks what a ridiculous unfriendly place it has come to and goes disappointed that there are over a thousand enemies and gets dejected that he can never overcome them.
Several weeks later, another puppy comes by to this land of thousand mirrors. It looks, and sees a thousand puppies looking at it anxiously. It smiles and gives a friendly wag. In return he sees a thousand puppies wagging their tail so friendly. Its now happier only to see happier puppies. The puppy is now a happy puppy which thinks about what a wonderful place and such wonderful friends he has made and finds its way back home.
Moral : Life is a mirror, what you see is what you are.
If you meet a lot of happy, honest, sincere people means you are all of that. Keep up your positivism.
But if all the people you meet are all sad, deceiving with life full of problems, then there is something that you need to change within yourself. And that change needs to continually happen until you become the happy puppy.
Weight of Water -
Once upon a time, a wise teacher asks his students to get the tiniest cup they can ever find and fill it with water. His students bring to him a tiny cup with just about half an ounce of water filled in it. He then called upon one of his students and asked them to stretch their hands and hold the cup of water. The student held the water for 15 minutes and said his arms were starting to ache. He asked another strong boy to hold it , that boy managed to hold for a longer time but complained his legs started to pain. Similarly, the same experiment was repeated with a number of people and all of them failed with different complaints.
He then asked his students, if half an ounce of water was really that heavy ? It was not. But holding it for so long is what makes it painful.
Moral : Never hold your anger, frustration, jealousy, envy on anyone for so long that what seems like a fleck of sand now might grow into a mountain after sometime.
There is nothing in this world that cannot be resolved. Try to resolve your problems and be honest to yourself.
Frog Race -
Long long ago, in a distant enchanted land where all the animals could speak , they held a frog race. All the frogs had to climb the tallest tower and the one that reaches the top wins a prize. Now, frogs of different shapes, colours, sizes all participated in the amazing frog race. There were also many that were just mere audience. They kept telling the frogs how difficult it was to reach the top and how impossible it was. Slowly, several frogs gave up and looking at these frogs that failed many others continued to follow and also gave up. However, there was this one tiny frog that kept going and going and finally reached the top of the tower and won the race.
They asked the little frog how it managed to win the race and they found it was deaf.
Moral : You may meet a lot of people who would discourage you , talk you into bringing disharmony to others - give them a deaf ear and do only what would bring happiness to the people around you.
Fancy Tea cups
to be continued :D
With due respect to my absentmindedness, I have decided to make a collection of moral stories that I have heard or read someplace that made a difference in my life. These stories retold is what I will be telling my grand and great children.
The Happy Puppy Story -
Once upon a time in a distant land , far far away there was a large colosseum like structure. In it was mirrors, thousands and thousands of mirrors. One such day, a puppy that got lost enters this house of mirrors. It looks , and sees a thousand puppies looking at it anxiously. It gives out an angry ruff and it sees a thousand angry looking puppies. It thinks what a ridiculous unfriendly place it has come to and goes disappointed that there are over a thousand enemies and gets dejected that he can never overcome them.
Several weeks later, another puppy comes by to this land of thousand mirrors. It looks, and sees a thousand puppies looking at it anxiously. It smiles and gives a friendly wag. In return he sees a thousand puppies wagging their tail so friendly. Its now happier only to see happier puppies. The puppy is now a happy puppy which thinks about what a wonderful place and such wonderful friends he has made and finds its way back home.
Moral : Life is a mirror, what you see is what you are.
If you meet a lot of happy, honest, sincere people means you are all of that. Keep up your positivism.
But if all the people you meet are all sad, deceiving with life full of problems, then there is something that you need to change within yourself. And that change needs to continually happen until you become the happy puppy.
Weight of Water -
Once upon a time, a wise teacher asks his students to get the tiniest cup they can ever find and fill it with water. His students bring to him a tiny cup with just about half an ounce of water filled in it. He then called upon one of his students and asked them to stretch their hands and hold the cup of water. The student held the water for 15 minutes and said his arms were starting to ache. He asked another strong boy to hold it , that boy managed to hold for a longer time but complained his legs started to pain. Similarly, the same experiment was repeated with a number of people and all of them failed with different complaints.
He then asked his students, if half an ounce of water was really that heavy ? It was not. But holding it for so long is what makes it painful.
Moral : Never hold your anger, frustration, jealousy, envy on anyone for so long that what seems like a fleck of sand now might grow into a mountain after sometime.
There is nothing in this world that cannot be resolved. Try to resolve your problems and be honest to yourself.
Frog Race -
Long long ago, in a distant enchanted land where all the animals could speak , they held a frog race. All the frogs had to climb the tallest tower and the one that reaches the top wins a prize. Now, frogs of different shapes, colours, sizes all participated in the amazing frog race. There were also many that were just mere audience. They kept telling the frogs how difficult it was to reach the top and how impossible it was. Slowly, several frogs gave up and looking at these frogs that failed many others continued to follow and also gave up. However, there was this one tiny frog that kept going and going and finally reached the top of the tower and won the race.
They asked the little frog how it managed to win the race and they found it was deaf.
Moral : You may meet a lot of people who would discourage you , talk you into bringing disharmony to others - give them a deaf ear and do only what would bring happiness to the people around you.
Fancy Tea cups
to be continued :D
Monday, April 13, 2009
Jeeeez Relax !
One of my early memories has my daddy saying " dhaa.. ee kocchu ippo karayum " ( watch, this kid's gonna cry now !) and I don't know what magic those words have, everytime he said it I have cried. Usually, there never was a reason for me to cry, so it was followed by the routine teases for being a cry baby by my brother with the special ritual poem " Azhuda ponnu sirichidaam , kazhudhai paalu kudichidaam " . ( Crying missy's smiling now , donkey's milk is what she drank).
It makes no sense, but it took almost 15 years for me to think of it as 'no big deal' and actually not get offended with my brother's poetry. Ah ! well, that seems like it was a long long time ago.
Whole of this week, I was busy attending conferences and meetings all day long trying to dot the i's and cross the t's. And that is all we have been trying to do all day and it still isn't complete. I had only heard of professional goof ups but recently I was lucky enough to be a significant part of it.
So it goes,
Original Business requirement - Remove just the core from the apple and give the apple back as it is with little or no wastage of fruit.
Pre-sales understanding and response - Remove the seeds inside the core and give 'it' back to them. ( The 'It' is still something everyone is unsure of)
Sales Team presentation and proposal to business - Ability to remove the seeds, core , peel of not just the apple but also bananas, jack(ass) fruit, orange, mango, tables, chairs etc . Thats not it , they also provide their 'valuable and esteemed ' clients a free "home grown" environment friendly core-peel-seed recycle processing machine.
Changed Business Requirement - Remove ' peel and seeds' and yeah the core too from apple and also from grapes, a critical component identified after sales team presentation and of course the free environment friendly core-peel-seed recycle processing machine.
Pressure on upper management - As we now have one successful customer , now use this as a case study to sell our core-peel-seed recycle processing machine to multiple clients. And yeah don't forget to remove some stuff from the apple and was it grapes ?.
Solution Delivery Management - Make sure that our core-peel-seed recycle processing machine is inline with the stuff you make to remove the core and peel and seeds from apples.
By the time the requirement is finally handed over to the technical team, everyone has forgotten what the original customer requirement was and everyone is trying to work on a totally different project.
Issues faced by technical team - We cannot remove core from one of their critical component grapes because it doesn't really have one. It is also hard to remove the peel from apples as they are waxed.
So, the core-peel-seed recycle processing machine is not really useful for this particular client.
Upper Management - Totally Unacceptable. If grapes don't have a core, then create a core and then remove it. Remove peel from soft side if you cannot remove from the hard side. Why is this so difficult or is the management making no sense ?
Project /Financial Management Team - Your team has 17 members to remove core from grapes that don't have any and to remove peel only from soft side. So, this project has fallen in 'very easy project' hence removing 12 people for cost cutting.
Final Solution Delivery to Customer - Apples that look like they are bitten from one side ( result of peel removing from softer side) , core successfully removed but seeds left over. Work in progress for grapes as core still unidentified. The input for core-peel-seed recycle processing machine is way too less for the machine to keep running..
Customer - What did I ask and what did I get ? Someone pls explain.
During a heavy debate at a meeting on such scenarios, there are characters that eventually attempt to calm the situation by saying the words - " Cool down ! " or " Don't get excited" or even " Jeez Relax "
I have always been happy for the person who is saying that to me in a meeting room because, (a). I don't have weapons to kill him (b). I don't have instant hot or cold water to pour on their faces.
*****I wonder if its just me or anyone else who shares similar sentiments of getting ticked off completely when someone tries to calm them down amidst an intense debate. *****
It makes no sense, but it took almost 15 years for me to think of it as 'no big deal' and actually not get offended with my brother's poetry. Ah ! well, that seems like it was a long long time ago.
Whole of this week, I was busy attending conferences and meetings all day long trying to dot the i's and cross the t's. And that is all we have been trying to do all day and it still isn't complete. I had only heard of professional goof ups but recently I was lucky enough to be a significant part of it.
So it goes,
Original Business requirement - Remove just the core from the apple and give the apple back as it is with little or no wastage of fruit.
Pre-sales understanding and response - Remove the seeds inside the core and give 'it' back to them. ( The 'It' is still something everyone is unsure of)
Sales Team presentation and proposal to business - Ability to remove the seeds, core , peel of not just the apple but also bananas, jack(ass) fruit, orange, mango, tables, chairs etc . Thats not it , they also provide their 'valuable and esteemed ' clients a free "home grown" environment friendly core-peel-seed recycle processing machine.
Changed Business Requirement - Remove ' peel and seeds' and yeah the core too from apple and also from grapes, a critical component identified after sales team presentation and of course the free environment friendly core-peel-seed recycle processing machine.
Pressure on upper management - As we now have one successful customer , now use this as a case study to sell our core-peel-seed recycle processing machine to multiple clients. And yeah don't forget to remove some stuff from the apple and was it grapes ?.
Solution Delivery Management - Make sure that our core-peel-seed recycle processing machine is inline with the stuff you make to remove the core and peel and seeds from apples.
By the time the requirement is finally handed over to the technical team, everyone has forgotten what the original customer requirement was and everyone is trying to work on a totally different project.
Issues faced by technical team - We cannot remove core from one of their critical component grapes because it doesn't really have one. It is also hard to remove the peel from apples as they are waxed.
So, the core-peel-seed recycle processing machine is not really useful for this particular client.
Upper Management - Totally Unacceptable. If grapes don't have a core, then create a core and then remove it. Remove peel from soft side if you cannot remove from the hard side. Why is this so difficult or is the management making no sense ?
Project /Financial Management Team - Your team has 17 members to remove core from grapes that don't have any and to remove peel only from soft side. So, this project has fallen in 'very easy project' hence removing 12 people for cost cutting.
Final Solution Delivery to Customer - Apples that look like they are bitten from one side ( result of peel removing from softer side) , core successfully removed but seeds left over. Work in progress for grapes as core still unidentified. The input for core-peel-seed recycle processing machine is way too less for the machine to keep running..
Customer - What did I ask and what did I get ? Someone pls explain.
During a heavy debate at a meeting on such scenarios, there are characters that eventually attempt to calm the situation by saying the words - " Cool down ! " or " Don't get excited" or even " Jeez Relax "
I have always been happy for the person who is saying that to me in a meeting room because, (a). I don't have weapons to kill him (b). I don't have instant hot or cold water to pour on their faces.
*****I wonder if its just me or anyone else who shares similar sentiments of getting ticked off completely when someone tries to calm them down amidst an intense debate. *****
Friday, April 3, 2009
Luck Factor
The dictionary meaning of Luck is "An unknown and unpredictable phenomenon that leads to a favourable outcome" , so is there something called as Bad luck ?
Well, the last few weeks my luck with driving the car is going to the dogs. Every single time I take the car out, I have a minor accident. The number of accidents I have had since Oct 08 , makes up for 5 years of driving with no accidents at all.
The images of the first ever accident I had is still vivid, something I'll never forget. We were 3 or 4 girls who decided to go watch a movie at a theater by the scenic highway called ' East Coast Road '.
Movie was average ( the lead lady dies at the end in an accident ). Anyway, it was just before dusk and in India we don't have automatic headlights, so I didn't turn the lights on either. Funny enough, the road was dark and didn't have street lights either resulting in my extreme irritation. Suddenly, I hear a loud thud and I see a crack on the windshield. Before I knew, 3 people down. All fishermen whose wives came from no where crying for their husbands. The lady doctor confirmed nothing happened and first aid was given. Yet, the crowd was increasing bit by bit.
4 young women - first experience of its kind - completely shaken up. Crowd now hit 80+ people. I called upon my best friends David and Matthew who were jazzily dressed to go for a party. It was now canceled thanks to me. We took them to a hospital and doctors double triple confirmed that there is not even a fracture or for that matter even a bruise. Yet, the crowd increased just to scare us young women who had 3-4 guys to support.
Finally, with some money we managed to go home. David's amazing lawyer dad helped me out of this whole mess. I still remember when we left for home, there must have been atleast 200 odd people waiting to thrash the guys. How we came home unhurt from those unruly fisher folk still a big question.
That day, I made my mind not to drive fast and I don't.That was my first and last accident until October 08.
Although not proud of it, I have driven at 115 Mph on I90W to Dakota for over an hour, didn't get caught by cops nor met with any mishap of any kind. Things were fine. But I knew I was taking my luck too far.
I landed home in Oct 08 and have taken the car out about 10 times and everytime I have had a accident. Most of them are minor , yet an accident. I know the dimensions of the car better than the back of my hand, yet I made mistakes while parking, hit the roof on low tree bark once and another time I hit the pavement. Another time, I signaled towards the right but missed to look over my shoulder and hit a guy. I can go on.
Does it mean, that last 5 yrs when nothing bad happened, I was having good luck and now bad luck ? I have never lost my confidence in anything but more than 5 consecutive minor accidents and today major , I can't help it.
My friend Jared in US , had a similar experience. He had never once even had a scratch on his car or any tickets from cop until one day he decides to take my roommates roommates to Chicago as it was still raining in GRB and the weather in Chicago was predicted to be sunny. One of the girls requests for a tiny drive for a couple of exits and within no time, the car twisted and toppled and damaged to a large extent but repairable. All escaped unhurt though. That was the beginning of car-bad luck for Jared. After that , he got so many tickets until his licence got suspended. Finally, he met with a major accident that damaged his car of 4 years completely and was taken to junk yard.
For 4 long years, he never had a ticket or a scratch and the same person had his licence revoked and car sent to junkyard all within a span of 3-4 mnths. What the hell do you call this ?
I am pretty much going through the same phase now, I have been careful to never even have a scratch on my car after the first one, and now suddenly within a span of 3-4 mnths so many.
Its scary, is it bad luck or plain carelessness ? If its carelessness, what changed ? If its bad luck - is there a charm that can get me through this quickly?
Well, the last few weeks my luck with driving the car is going to the dogs. Every single time I take the car out, I have a minor accident. The number of accidents I have had since Oct 08 , makes up for 5 years of driving with no accidents at all.
The images of the first ever accident I had is still vivid, something I'll never forget. We were 3 or 4 girls who decided to go watch a movie at a theater by the scenic highway called ' East Coast Road '.
Movie was average ( the lead lady dies at the end in an accident ). Anyway, it was just before dusk and in India we don't have automatic headlights, so I didn't turn the lights on either. Funny enough, the road was dark and didn't have street lights either resulting in my extreme irritation. Suddenly, I hear a loud thud and I see a crack on the windshield. Before I knew, 3 people down. All fishermen whose wives came from no where crying for their husbands. The lady doctor confirmed nothing happened and first aid was given. Yet, the crowd was increasing bit by bit.
4 young women - first experience of its kind - completely shaken up. Crowd now hit 80+ people. I called upon my best friends David and Matthew who were jazzily dressed to go for a party. It was now canceled thanks to me. We took them to a hospital and doctors double triple confirmed that there is not even a fracture or for that matter even a bruise. Yet, the crowd increased just to scare us young women who had 3-4 guys to support.
Finally, with some money we managed to go home. David's amazing lawyer dad helped me out of this whole mess. I still remember when we left for home, there must have been atleast 200 odd people waiting to thrash the guys. How we came home unhurt from those unruly fisher folk still a big question.
That day, I made my mind not to drive fast and I don't.That was my first and last accident until October 08.
Although not proud of it, I have driven at 115 Mph on I90W to Dakota for over an hour, didn't get caught by cops nor met with any mishap of any kind. Things were fine. But I knew I was taking my luck too far.
I landed home in Oct 08 and have taken the car out about 10 times and everytime I have had a accident. Most of them are minor , yet an accident. I know the dimensions of the car better than the back of my hand, yet I made mistakes while parking, hit the roof on low tree bark once and another time I hit the pavement. Another time, I signaled towards the right but missed to look over my shoulder and hit a guy. I can go on.
Does it mean, that last 5 yrs when nothing bad happened, I was having good luck and now bad luck ? I have never lost my confidence in anything but more than 5 consecutive minor accidents and today major , I can't help it.
My friend Jared in US , had a similar experience. He had never once even had a scratch on his car or any tickets from cop until one day he decides to take my roommates roommates to Chicago as it was still raining in GRB and the weather in Chicago was predicted to be sunny. One of the girls requests for a tiny drive for a couple of exits and within no time, the car twisted and toppled and damaged to a large extent but repairable. All escaped unhurt though. That was the beginning of car-bad luck for Jared. After that , he got so many tickets until his licence got suspended. Finally, he met with a major accident that damaged his car of 4 years completely and was taken to junk yard.
For 4 long years, he never had a ticket or a scratch and the same person had his licence revoked and car sent to junkyard all within a span of 3-4 mnths. What the hell do you call this ?
I am pretty much going through the same phase now, I have been careful to never even have a scratch on my car after the first one, and now suddenly within a span of 3-4 mnths so many.
Its scary, is it bad luck or plain carelessness ? If its carelessness, what changed ? If its bad luck - is there a charm that can get me through this quickly?
Thursday, April 2, 2009
Mantra !
'You are next !' - a phrase abundantly used at weddings. If you are 50+ and happen to spot a young bachelorette at a wedding, you have got to tell her 'You are next !' , otherwise you would break the golden chain of putting them in the most uncomfortable spot.
However, don't ever ever say this at funerals because you know why :-)
Similarly, the phrase can turn out to be quite offensive when you say 'you are next' to someone who is at the same rank as yours just after you got a big big promotion. What makes it worse is the prefix " Hey, don't worry " that some people add hoping it makes things better. The person who you are saying that to is probably smiling and saying " Happy for you. You deserve it " but actually thinking " Like hell you do ! and hey remember to take the knife out of my back"
It can be especially nerve racking just after the receptionist looks at you with a broad smile and says ' you are next ' while sitting at a waiting room either for an interview for a much wanted job or even at a hospital especially when there are surprises ( wink wink)
Most of my relatives have a mantra handy that would make the unhealthy perfectly fit , single men and women married within a snap of a finger, people looking for an instant promotion, wanting children, wanting house, wanting to go abroad and all the remaining bazillion wishes. Sometimes makes me wonder what would happen if one day everyone decides to say mantras and stop working.
For a long time I never really understood the meaning of the words Mantra and Tantra, let alone say mantras that would give me health and wealth. I recently found what they meant. 'Man' in fact means mind and 'Tra' means protect.Similarly 'Tan' means body. So, Mantra and Tantra are just ways of protecting the mind and body.
But does saying mantras really help ? - I have no experience. But I do believe that there is a strong external force ( not magnetic field) that keeps the earth and its people in its place.. And I also believe when you keep repeating "good" things that you would like it to happen - will happen. ( for me the reverse works better - say I want a gold fish for my birthday , i'll keep saying 'I hope I dont get a silver fish' and bam - I get a gold fish :D )
I have also learnt that people I meet everyday are like my 5 fingers, each one is so different yet are important and have a purpose and a reason why they came into your life. Like I read somewhere, some come for a reason and disappear once their purpose accomplished. Some others come in a season, they just come for a while and turn your life by 360 degrees and disappear for no reason. All others are remain for lifetime. Well, I have had people in all three categories and hope to add more people in my lifetime category.
Why am I writing this - I have no idea and why so philosophical - because I am sleepy.
However, don't ever ever say this at funerals because you know why :-)
Similarly, the phrase can turn out to be quite offensive when you say 'you are next' to someone who is at the same rank as yours just after you got a big big promotion. What makes it worse is the prefix " Hey, don't worry " that some people add hoping it makes things better. The person who you are saying that to is probably smiling and saying " Happy for you. You deserve it " but actually thinking " Like hell you do ! and hey remember to take the knife out of my back"
It can be especially nerve racking just after the receptionist looks at you with a broad smile and says ' you are next ' while sitting at a waiting room either for an interview for a much wanted job or even at a hospital especially when there are surprises ( wink wink)
Most of my relatives have a mantra handy that would make the unhealthy perfectly fit , single men and women married within a snap of a finger, people looking for an instant promotion, wanting children, wanting house, wanting to go abroad and all the remaining bazillion wishes. Sometimes makes me wonder what would happen if one day everyone decides to say mantras and stop working.
For a long time I never really understood the meaning of the words Mantra and Tantra, let alone say mantras that would give me health and wealth. I recently found what they meant. 'Man' in fact means mind and 'Tra' means protect.Similarly 'Tan' means body. So, Mantra and Tantra are just ways of protecting the mind and body.
But does saying mantras really help ? - I have no experience. But I do believe that there is a strong external force ( not magnetic field) that keeps the earth and its people in its place.. And I also believe when you keep repeating "good" things that you would like it to happen - will happen. ( for me the reverse works better - say I want a gold fish for my birthday , i'll keep saying 'I hope I dont get a silver fish' and bam - I get a gold fish :D )
I have also learnt that people I meet everyday are like my 5 fingers, each one is so different yet are important and have a purpose and a reason why they came into your life. Like I read somewhere, some come for a reason and disappear once their purpose accomplished. Some others come in a season, they just come for a while and turn your life by 360 degrees and disappear for no reason. All others are remain for lifetime. Well, I have had people in all three categories and hope to add more people in my lifetime category.
Why am I writing this - I have no idea and why so philosophical - because I am sleepy.
Sunday, March 15, 2009
Karadayar nombu
I am not a great reader and definitely not a great writer. However, I have always had a great interest in learning new cultures be it within India or foreign. I am by all means intrigued with the similarities the Greek and Indian mythology have. The `I am the greatest` fight among the goddesses - Lakshmi, Saraswathi and Parvathi Vs Hera, Athena and Aphrodite, lust for another man's wife - Helen Vs Sita or Draupadi, invincible power with just one weakness area leading to downfall - Duryodhana's thigh Vs Achilless heel , warfares for hundreds of years with a woman being the root cause - Trojan war Vs Mahabharath and many many more..
But no culture except for us Indians have the custom of women folk praying for their husband's health and longevity.I am impressed with the selfless nature inculcated in Indian women since their childhood. While most things are a lot different now and career seems more important , some things and some thoughts never change..
What Karwa Chauth is for the Northies or Varalakshmi Vratham is for the Andhrites , yesterday was the Karadaya nombu - an exclusive function for Tamil Iyers celebrated by all the married women for the health and longevity of their husbands and unmarried for their future husbands.
While it might appear to be funny that we pray for our future husbands , I think its sweet. Because - a. we pray for some one we never heard of b. It doesn't hurt to pray c. The post puja prasad is delicious.
The legend goes that there once lived a beautiful and intelligent princess named Savithri who was to be married to Sathyavan. But alas, Sathyavan was destined to die within a year which would make Savithri a widow. She was warned by sage Narad of the consequences of if she married him. She ignored the warning and Sathyavan died on a fateful day. The story goes on with how undeterred she was to bring him back to life, the penances she does and how she convinces the Yama, the god of death to give him back to her.
Legend also has it that her chastity could melt a rock or solidify a liquid. One day just when the month of magham was changing to panguni , and all she had was oru pidi arisi maavu ( one fist full of rice flour ) and vellam ( jaggery). She made an adai ( patty) with those ingredients and butter to appease the Gods. The butter never melted to show her resolute and unshakable faith.
So to date, all the Tamil iyer women offer adai ( made out of jaggery and rice flour) topped with butter and with vethalai paaku and tie a yellow thread with arali poo and manjal on their necks and say the below prayer -
Urugaatha vennayum Oradayum notren ( I offer you one adai with butter that wouldnt melt )
Orukalum en kanavan piriyathirukkanam ( may my husband and I never be apart )
I remember my mother doing this since I was a child and making me do it as well.. never really understood the meaning but always loved this festival.
But no culture except for us Indians have the custom of women folk praying for their husband's health and longevity.I am impressed with the selfless nature inculcated in Indian women since their childhood. While most things are a lot different now and career seems more important , some things and some thoughts never change..
What Karwa Chauth is for the Northies or Varalakshmi Vratham is for the Andhrites , yesterday was the Karadaya nombu - an exclusive function for Tamil Iyers celebrated by all the married women for the health and longevity of their husbands and unmarried for their future husbands.
While it might appear to be funny that we pray for our future husbands , I think its sweet. Because - a. we pray for some one we never heard of b. It doesn't hurt to pray c. The post puja prasad is delicious.
The legend goes that there once lived a beautiful and intelligent princess named Savithri who was to be married to Sathyavan. But alas, Sathyavan was destined to die within a year which would make Savithri a widow. She was warned by sage Narad of the consequences of if she married him. She ignored the warning and Sathyavan died on a fateful day. The story goes on with how undeterred she was to bring him back to life, the penances she does and how she convinces the Yama, the god of death to give him back to her.
Legend also has it that her chastity could melt a rock or solidify a liquid. One day just when the month of magham was changing to panguni , and all she had was oru pidi arisi maavu ( one fist full of rice flour ) and vellam ( jaggery). She made an adai ( patty) with those ingredients and butter to appease the Gods. The butter never melted to show her resolute and unshakable faith.
So to date, all the Tamil iyer women offer adai ( made out of jaggery and rice flour) topped with butter and with vethalai paaku and tie a yellow thread with arali poo and manjal on their necks and say the below prayer -
Urugaatha vennayum Oradayum notren ( I offer you one adai with butter that wouldnt melt )
Orukalum en kanavan piriyathirukkanam ( may my husband and I never be apart )
I remember my mother doing this since I was a child and making me do it as well.. never really understood the meaning but always loved this festival.
Thursday, February 26, 2009
the saga of the big fight at home
Amma - Kondhey, I have made nice avial and molagu kutaan. Simply dont be sitting infront of that useless laptop all the time. Come and have dinner.
Mini - Pashikkalai amma. I am working and pls dont distract me.
Daddy - Ahaaan ! Enna pashikkalai ? You come so late from work, God knows whether you eat anything in the office. You are always looking tired and no thembu to do anything. No one will like you...
Amma - You have to marry and bear children, if you are not strong then no use. Dont keep sitting in the same pose like a hospital patient. Even a prasavichha lady will be more active.
Mini - Aaaargh ! OK ! . Chaapadnum. Avlodhaaney. Ok.
( Amma puts one "andaa" full of rice on plate + 50 gms ghee + lots of vadaam and appalam)
Mini - Why do you make it so spicy ? My eyes are burning and my nose is watering.
Anna - There is no uppu or chappu in this. Only mini can eat this.
Amma - Ippadiyee chollindirungoo..
(Mini's stomach's more than full and lets out a loud burp )
Mini - I cant have more than this ( takes an uneaten appalam and puts it on Anna's plate)
Daddy - Echhala parthadengo ma.. veetla daridhram varum cholluva..
Mini - Daddy, how is it possible ? Instead of throwing uneaten food, I put it on someone's plate, how would we get dadridhram ?
Amma - Dont unnecessarily argue with daddy. He is right. We should not spread echhal.
Mini - There is no logic in this.
Daddy - Bhesh ! Enna logic vendi irrukku ? College la you didnt study properly, we sent you to dance class, you said you wanted to learn music. Sent you to nalla carnataka sangeetham class, you leave that and go to hindustani.. now useless cinema paatu.. that too.. roadside paatu. So finally you dont know anything other than typing in that stupid laptop. Instead of spending so much to educate you, I should have put you in type writing school
Mini - Ippo enna ? I am useless. I will start my own company and become great. That day you can keep looking at me.
Daddy - Hahahahaha. Innum patthu varsham ippadiye lazyaa sit with laptop in that sofa, kandippa great ayiduvai
Mini mad, anna mad, amma madder and daddy maddest
Amma - kozhandhaya chutti podanum. Drishti. Thats why she's not eating properly and behaving so badly.
Mini - drishti and bad behaviour - eppadi amma related ? i am gettinng really angry..
Amma - Exactly, drishtiyeee dhaan
Daddy - Her friend circle sheri illai. We should cut all her friends first.
Amma - Amaaam.
Mini - Amma.. stop this amaam potufying for everything...
...... and so it continues.
Mini - Pashikkalai amma. I am working and pls dont distract me.
Daddy - Ahaaan ! Enna pashikkalai ? You come so late from work, God knows whether you eat anything in the office. You are always looking tired and no thembu to do anything. No one will like you...
Amma - You have to marry and bear children, if you are not strong then no use. Dont keep sitting in the same pose like a hospital patient. Even a prasavichha lady will be more active.
Mini - Aaaargh ! OK ! . Chaapadnum. Avlodhaaney. Ok.
( Amma puts one "andaa" full of rice on plate + 50 gms ghee + lots of vadaam and appalam)
Mini - Why do you make it so spicy ? My eyes are burning and my nose is watering.
Anna - There is no uppu or chappu in this. Only mini can eat this.
Amma - Ippadiyee chollindirungoo..
(Mini's stomach's more than full and lets out a loud burp )
Mini - I cant have more than this ( takes an uneaten appalam and puts it on Anna's plate)
Daddy - Echhala parthadengo ma.. veetla daridhram varum cholluva..
Mini - Daddy, how is it possible ? Instead of throwing uneaten food, I put it on someone's plate, how would we get dadridhram ?
Amma - Dont unnecessarily argue with daddy. He is right. We should not spread echhal.
Mini - There is no logic in this.
Daddy - Bhesh ! Enna logic vendi irrukku ? College la you didnt study properly, we sent you to dance class, you said you wanted to learn music. Sent you to nalla carnataka sangeetham class, you leave that and go to hindustani.. now useless cinema paatu.. that too.. roadside paatu. So finally you dont know anything other than typing in that stupid laptop. Instead of spending so much to educate you, I should have put you in type writing school
Mini - Ippo enna ? I am useless. I will start my own company and become great. That day you can keep looking at me.
Daddy - Hahahahaha. Innum patthu varsham ippadiye lazyaa sit with laptop in that sofa, kandippa great ayiduvai
Mini mad, anna mad, amma madder and daddy maddest
Amma - kozhandhaya chutti podanum. Drishti. Thats why she's not eating properly and behaving so badly.
Mini - drishti and bad behaviour - eppadi amma related ? i am gettinng really angry..
Amma - Exactly, drishtiyeee dhaan
Daddy - Her friend circle sheri illai. We should cut all her friends first.
Amma - Amaaam.
Mini - Amma.. stop this amaam potufying for everything...
...... and so it continues.
Monday, February 23, 2009
Bus Ride
Driving in peak traffic in Chennai requires skills - Skills of turning into an absolute deaf, blind and dumb person all at the same time.
Let me explain. Say, you have to reach the Railway station at 8 and you have been driving since 6 and are no where close to the station at 715 , well its time to use your skills. You must drive as though you are absolutely blind, honk the car as though you have never had an ear lobe and to the abuses you are bound to hear - A big smile back confirming you lack the power of human speech.
Hearing about Chennai traffic from the recent ' a la US returns' is extremely amusing. The typical cliched ' oh ! stupid me ! i havta remember that I gotta drive on the wrong side of the road' or ' ah! crap! i keep forgetting the driver's seat's on the other side' or ' when would the INDIANS ever learn to drive' but the one I fancy the most is ' yay ! no seat belts' like they've been wearing seat belts all their life. I am also proud to say that I have said all of the above typical U.S return bromides and many more.. :D
I had to collect my brother's wedding invitations at "Parrys" . When I was 6 and had come to Chennai for the very first time, my brother said we were going to "Paris" by train. I confirmed Paris as in 'London-Paris Paris' and he said of course, didn't you know the superfast 60 kmph electric train ride can take anyone to Paris. I did go and never found french speaking people or Eiffel tower. Bummer ? Not really !
12 years later, my best friends Jo and Vij decided to take me to 'Pondy' and I told the whole world I was going to Pondicherry. You should have seen the extremely intelligent look on my face when we reached " Pondy Bazaar " to do street shopping. Ouch ! but fun ! Jo however kept her promise and did take me to the 'real' Pondy a few years later ( for Addu' wedding if I am not wrong )
So anyway, I was strictly prohibited from driving to Parry's all by myself by family and friends. So, I took the superfast 60 kmph train to Parrys. The place in every aspect fits the word 'filthy' but if its wedding season or holiday season - this is the place. There is an entire street with only wedding cards , the first store say sells a card for 20 bucks a piece, the next store would have the same exact piece selling at 15 bucks a piece, the difference I could hardly tell. If you go further down, you get the same piece for 3 bucks, except now the quality is noticeably bad but is an exact replica of the original. So, my advice for goers to this place - bear the stench and get what you want for price you want.
On my return home, I decided to take a bus instead of the metro. I was annoyed by the overly crowded , extremely loud chattering vendors and constant smirks et clapperclawing of the bus conductor towards the public. I almost, decided to stomp out in rage but voted out. I got into thinking, hailing from a middle class family I have been taking the bus all my life until I turned out to be a proud owner of Lakshmi ( My first car, I will save the story of the car naming ceremony to a later date ). I have never once had to travel by bus since the car.
Once, I had the car, the bus - the same bus that took me places and for being the means of some great memories has became annoying and that something I would never would want to take till my last breath. I started to feel bad for the bus, and took it to the next level of thought.
But isn't moving from bus to car simply meant I have grown economically ? Every time I complain the prices of fuel going up or my car broke down doesn't it just mean that I am blessed enough to have my own transportation. Haven't I worked hard to have some of these pleasures in life that discarding to ride the bus shouldn't be a big deal anymore.
How much ever I try convincing myself that its not wrong to feel this way about not wanting to take the bus I a big question came to my head - Does this attitude mean I am the kind who would get rid of things as I progress in life ?
Well, all I can do is just pray and hope not.
Let me explain. Say, you have to reach the Railway station at 8 and you have been driving since 6 and are no where close to the station at 715 , well its time to use your skills. You must drive as though you are absolutely blind, honk the car as though you have never had an ear lobe and to the abuses you are bound to hear - A big smile back confirming you lack the power of human speech.
Hearing about Chennai traffic from the recent ' a la US returns' is extremely amusing. The typical cliched ' oh ! stupid me ! i havta remember that I gotta drive on the wrong side of the road' or ' ah! crap! i keep forgetting the driver's seat's on the other side' or ' when would the INDIANS ever learn to drive' but the one I fancy the most is ' yay ! no seat belts' like they've been wearing seat belts all their life. I am also proud to say that I have said all of the above typical U.S return bromides and many more.. :D
I had to collect my brother's wedding invitations at "Parrys" . When I was 6 and had come to Chennai for the very first time, my brother said we were going to "Paris" by train. I confirmed Paris as in 'London-Paris Paris' and he said of course, didn't you know the superfast 60 kmph electric train ride can take anyone to Paris. I did go and never found french speaking people or Eiffel tower. Bummer ? Not really !
12 years later, my best friends Jo and Vij decided to take me to 'Pondy' and I told the whole world I was going to Pondicherry. You should have seen the extremely intelligent look on my face when we reached " Pondy Bazaar " to do street shopping. Ouch ! but fun ! Jo however kept her promise and did take me to the 'real' Pondy a few years later ( for Addu' wedding if I am not wrong )
So anyway, I was strictly prohibited from driving to Parry's all by myself by family and friends. So, I took the superfast 60 kmph train to Parrys. The place in every aspect fits the word 'filthy' but if its wedding season or holiday season - this is the place. There is an entire street with only wedding cards , the first store say sells a card for 20 bucks a piece, the next store would have the same exact piece selling at 15 bucks a piece, the difference I could hardly tell. If you go further down, you get the same piece for 3 bucks, except now the quality is noticeably bad but is an exact replica of the original. So, my advice for goers to this place - bear the stench and get what you want for price you want.
On my return home, I decided to take a bus instead of the metro. I was annoyed by the overly crowded , extremely loud chattering vendors and constant smirks et clapperclawing of the bus conductor towards the public. I almost, decided to stomp out in rage but voted out. I got into thinking, hailing from a middle class family I have been taking the bus all my life until I turned out to be a proud owner of Lakshmi ( My first car, I will save the story of the car naming ceremony to a later date ). I have never once had to travel by bus since the car.
Once, I had the car, the bus - the same bus that took me places and for being the means of some great memories has became annoying and that something I would never would want to take till my last breath. I started to feel bad for the bus, and took it to the next level of thought.
But isn't moving from bus to car simply meant I have grown economically ? Every time I complain the prices of fuel going up or my car broke down doesn't it just mean that I am blessed enough to have my own transportation. Haven't I worked hard to have some of these pleasures in life that discarding to ride the bus shouldn't be a big deal anymore.
How much ever I try convincing myself that its not wrong to feel this way about not wanting to take the bus I a big question came to my head - Does this attitude mean I am the kind who would get rid of things as I progress in life ?
Well, all I can do is just pray and hope not.
Monday, February 16, 2009
Which was my best year ?
A good friend of mine called me today and asked me what appeared to be a very simple question - Which has been your best year ? The answer however to me was very complex. While pondering on it, I asked him the same question back and pat came the answer '14, 16,18 and 22 were the best years of my life'
And I wished I could have had an instant answer just like my friend. I started to think, have I already had the best year of my life so far ? Or am I being so overly critical about my life that I can't even pick one good year out of the last 20 some years.
Life has definitely been a roller coaster as it has been to everyone else and I have had my share of the several ups and a the few downs. Its scary with the add-on queasy sensation when the ride goes down but that only makes the thrill of going up even more spine-tingling.
2008 - I enjoyed the nature hikes I took, slogged like a dog @ work and met some really nice people, found an American mom who made sure I was doing fine at all times, had a beautiful mini's mini garden that blossomed so well - managed to get 8 tomatoes, 12 red roses, 12 pink roses, and 12 yellow flowers and atleast a 100 purple petunias. Time just flew..
2007 - Celebrated by silver birthday in the most beautiful city - Montreal ( which was my previous year's wish), Enjoyed my very first walk on a snowy evening ( it snowed one day after Christmas that year), took pride in going for my first ever self sponsored holiday to the Far East.
And the list goes on ... every year has been good for me.. Some may be monotonous but good ! :D
And I wished I could have had an instant answer just like my friend. I started to think, have I already had the best year of my life so far ? Or am I being so overly critical about my life that I can't even pick one good year out of the last 20 some years.
Life has definitely been a roller coaster as it has been to everyone else and I have had my share of the several ups and a the few downs. Its scary with the add-on queasy sensation when the ride goes down but that only makes the thrill of going up even more spine-tingling.
2008 - I enjoyed the nature hikes I took, slogged like a dog @ work and met some really nice people, found an American mom who made sure I was doing fine at all times, had a beautiful mini's mini garden that blossomed so well - managed to get 8 tomatoes, 12 red roses, 12 pink roses, and 12 yellow flowers and atleast a 100 purple petunias. Time just flew..
2007 - Celebrated by silver birthday in the most beautiful city - Montreal ( which was my previous year's wish), Enjoyed my very first walk on a snowy evening ( it snowed one day after Christmas that year), took pride in going for my first ever self sponsored holiday to the Far East.
And the list goes on ... every year has been good for me.. Some may be monotonous but good ! :D
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
Jokes
Teacher: Translate - Bazaar mein goliyan chal rahi hain.
Santa Singh: The Tablets are walking in the market.
Interviewer: What is skeleton?
Santa Singh: Skeleton is a person who started dieting but forgot to stop it..!!! *
Santa ki chatri me hole tha, kisine pucha, umbrella mein
hole kyu?
Sardar bola: Oye barish ruk jayegi to pata kaise chalega.
Santa Singh: Why has the Govt. fixed voting age 18yrs &
marriage age 21yrs?
Banta: Govt. ko pata hai ki desh sambhalna aasan hai, lekin
biwi ko nahi. *
*Driver: Sir ji, petrol khatam ho gaya , gaadi aage nahi ja
sakti.
Banta: Chalo Phir, wapis le chalo.*
Banta: Kal Muje 10 logo ne Peeta.
Santa Singh: Phir tune kya kiya?
Banta: Maine kaha salon ek-ek karke aao.
Santa Singh: Phir?
Banta: Phir kya, Salon ne ek-ek karke dubara Peeta ! *
The donkey
The pastor entered his donkey in a race and it won.
The pastor was so pleased with the donkey that he entered in another race and it won again.
The local paper read: PASTOR'S ASS OUT FRONT.
The Bishop was so upset with this kind of publicity that he ordered the pastor not to enter the donkey in any more races.
The next day the local paper headline read: BISHOP SCRATCHES THE PASTOR'S ASS.
This was too much for the Bishop, so he ordered the pastor to get rid of the donkey. The pastor decided to give it to a nun in a nearby convent.
The local paper, hearing of the news, posted the following headline: NUN HAS THE BEST ASS IN TOWN .
The Bishop fainted.
He informed the nun that she would have to get rid of the donkey so she sold it to a farmer for $10.
The next day the headlines read: NUN SELLS ASS FOR $10.
This was too much for the Bishop, so he ordered the nun to buy back the donkey and lead it to the high plains where it could run free.
The next day the headlines read : NUN ANNOUNCES HER ASS IS WILD AND FREE.
Alas... The Bishop was buried the next day.
Santa Singh: The Tablets are walking in the market.
Interviewer: What is skeleton?
Santa Singh: Skeleton is a person who started dieting but forgot to stop it..!!! *
Santa ki chatri me hole tha, kisine pucha, umbrella mein
hole kyu?
Sardar bola: Oye barish ruk jayegi to pata kaise chalega.
Santa Singh: Why has the Govt. fixed voting age 18yrs &
marriage age 21yrs?
Banta: Govt. ko pata hai ki desh sambhalna aasan hai, lekin
biwi ko nahi. *
*Driver: Sir ji, petrol khatam ho gaya , gaadi aage nahi ja
sakti.
Banta: Chalo Phir, wapis le chalo.*
Banta: Kal Muje 10 logo ne Peeta.
Santa Singh: Phir tune kya kiya?
Banta: Maine kaha salon ek-ek karke aao.
Santa Singh: Phir?
Banta: Phir kya, Salon ne ek-ek karke dubara Peeta ! *
The donkey
The pastor entered his donkey in a race and it won.
The pastor was so pleased with the donkey that he entered in another race and it won again.
The local paper read: PASTOR'S ASS OUT FRONT.
The Bishop was so upset with this kind of publicity that he ordered the pastor not to enter the donkey in any more races.
The next day the local paper headline read: BISHOP SCRATCHES THE PASTOR'S ASS.
This was too much for the Bishop, so he ordered the pastor to get rid of the donkey. The pastor decided to give it to a nun in a nearby convent.
The local paper, hearing of the news, posted the following headline: NUN HAS THE BEST ASS IN TOWN .
The Bishop fainted.
He informed the nun that she would have to get rid of the donkey so she sold it to a farmer for $10.
The next day the headlines read: NUN SELLS ASS FOR $10.
This was too much for the Bishop, so he ordered the nun to buy back the donkey and lead it to the high plains where it could run free.
The next day the headlines read : NUN ANNOUNCES HER ASS IS WILD AND FREE.
Alas... The Bishop was buried the next day.
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